Somewhere

Express yourself through paper and pen
Where in the world have I been?
Been wandering those dark and gloomy lands
where the sunshine casts an eerie light
upon the corners and crevices of the twisting hills
You may be on top of the Earth
but nothing matters if my soul is lost.
Gliding in dark shadows under hills and over
like a heavey laden traveler in a foreign land
each weary step heavier than the next
sinking in the drudge of that bog named self afflicition
wondering where he has gone and why.
with that eerie sunlight shooting down.
like some abstract and forgotten hope
dimming the eyes of my remembrance
of days gone before on this path of solitude
where the crow doth caw and the wind
plays with the overgrown path
but there is yet hope
hope that the next hill holds
a gentler slope and a peaceful rest.

3.10.03

Untitled

A year passes,
and here I stand
Life passes,
and here I stand.
So young among the ancient of days.
The day passes,
and here I stand.
The waves crash,
the stars, see how they shine.
They sparkle and shimmer
as my days grow dimmer.
They march on.
They crash on.
They wait for no one.
They are silent.
But deep within they cry out,
like a banshee or some ancient Greek siren
Amazing love of sinful lust
that is not love but hate.

10.30.02

A fading epiphany

I am not a man of in betweens
I am either here or there
I see the space behind the face
I know the beat upon thy heart
I see beyond your words and footsteps
I stand alone listening to the song of the leaves dancing in the wind
I vanish away
I fade into the gentle breeze
I fade into your eyes
I fade into the earth I tread upon
I fade into the distance
the distance I see in life
The distance of this earth stretches into infinity
And I can barely fathom it before it collapses...
back into the snap of the wind
the song of the birds
the smile in your face
It fades away.
The distance fades away.
Everything near fades into an oblivious sharp epiphany
I see the tree
I see the sky
I see the traffic
I see the movement
The constant change is static
And it stretches apart from me
My dying eyes its focal point
Time-place-circumstance-memory
and moment reign no more upon my soul.
Everything fades away from me, inside of me
This earth, this grey shadow of reality,
Fragile on the reflection of a teardrop
So various, so beautiful, so new
So static, so grey, so old.
A paradox within my eyes-
within my mind upon my soul.
Everything grey fades away from and into me.

Blue

Ah love...
Let us be true to one another...
The beginning lines of a wonderful Matthew Arnold poem.
Why start out with such a line? Because life inspires me to. Because
you in my life inspire me to.

Ah beauty too wonderful to behold.
Your smile is a dagger to my heart.
On your eyes I float, descend, rise and fold.
I hang on every word you impart.
A fullness dwells within
more than words can say
and I am left here with a grin
thinking of you this day.
tomorrow is too far away
turning twisting like a knife
mocking my internal strife
missing you is my bane
i hung my head in the rain
then the thought of you
like a shooting star
shot across my heart
an image, a dream
and it was clear as a mountain stream
there you were standing next to me
your eyes shining as the dawn
and the touch of your hands on mine
made the galaxies come ablaze
a brilliant shining spinning ecstasy
a rhapsody between you and me
and the enchantment of the world
bred upon the tender touch
of you and me.

Espirit D'escalier

I will be the gladdest thing
Under the sun!
When I can watch your eyes,
glance on me and I become undone.
Happiness and an epiphany in this:
the defintion of too good to be true
comes to me in a brilliant shade of blue.
And each rising morn
my mind replays your smile, your eyes
and breatheless yet again
akin to every glimpse of thee.

Paris

I see faces
I've seen Paris
A photograph, a glimpse, a glance
A shot of you, of me - a shot of cognac
and gauloises disque bleu's - riding black taxi
A shot of Paris in my eye - a sidewalk
of black clad hollowness gliding, weaving streetside
upon the rue castiglione
painting flickering streetlight reflecting upon
the puddle within my minds eye
sidewalk simmering sweltering flesh
against the rhythm of the rolling, creaking, blaring
smoking traffic- ageless, endless, pumping,
throbbing, pounding footsteps stretch upon the pavement
trapped within ones self trapped within ones space
forever walking treading upon the mumbling rumbling echo of my minds eye
silhouetted sunsets set against my face
glancing eyes swiftly look away
and Paris swallows swooning lovers upon the Seine
the Eiffel Tower stands alone
gargoyles stare in my direction
seeking seperation from their stony perch
timeless, ageless, enduring ediface
standing all alone.

From Hemingway

"They were walking through the heather of the mountain meadow and Robert Jordan felt the brushing of the heather against his legs, felt the weight of his pistol in its holster against his thigh, felt the sun on his head, felt the breeze from the snow of the mountain peaks cool on his back and, in his hand, he felt the girls hand firm and strong, the fingers interlocked in his.
From it, from the palm of her hand, against the palm of his, from their fingers locked together, and from her wrist across his wrist something came from her hand, her fingers and her wrist to his that was as fresh as the first light air that moving toward you over the sea barely wrinkles the glassy surface of a calm, as light as a feather moved across one's lip, or a leaf falling when there is no breeze; so light that it could be felt with the touch of their fingers alone, but that was so strengthened, so intensified, and made so urgent, so aching and so strong by the hard presssure of their fingers and the close pressed palm and wrist, that it was as though a current moved up his arm and filled his whole body with an aching hollowness of wanting.
With the sun shining on her hair, tawney as wheat, and on her golden brown smooth lovely face and on the curve of her throat he bent her head back and held her to him and kissed her."


Ah.......the bold smooth beauty of words....of a moment....of a place...of a beautiful kiss.
In me lays that calm aching hollowness of wanting with the breeze at my back and the sun on my head.... the world spins and I am standing still in this moment of mine forever paused on that plain of dreams as golden as a sunset.
Caught in beauty forever unfolding around me.

The Sacrifice

Veritgo of Time

Gone in sixty seconds is my love
Gone in sixty seconds is my love
The tic of the clock
The beat of my heart
How much time? How much time?
Forevery leaning over the edge
The edge of love and emptiness
The black and red kaleidoscope spirals within me - a vertigo
A fear of heights- the distance to my love
A canyon full of life seperates me from you
Where are you? Who are you?
Who is it that you are to me?
From what distance can I hear the echo of your heartbeat?
At what expanse of time and space will you beat for me?
The waves mumble you name and I am lost in them.
Crashing against the rocky shore
Bloody, bruised, battered...I weep
with love and joy - heaping sorrow
upon the Earth of greens and browns
Releasing myself unfettered by the moonlight
and the ancient stars distilled
within the night...
heart beating, pattering, pounding, whispering
echo's of love upon thy shore.